Blow Me!

I told an old lady to blow me today. Now here's the story.

I was in line at the post office picking up a package. It was busy. Everybody was already mad because only one person was working but I didn't vent at all because shit like that happens to good people. Well Mrs. I Can't Wait Any Longer In Line shouts at the lady at the front to hurry her fat ass up. Everybody just looked at her. Then she started shouting at the kids playing like 10 feet away from her. You can tell the old lady is getting pissed. She starts breathing hard agitated. She then starts shouting at the kids again to "stop fucking moving!" I thought it was pretty funny for an old lady to do that but hey I just gave her a look. Then the Old Wrinkle Bag gave me a look back like who the hell am I to stare at her. And she hits me. Not just a tap but a damn slap! Now I'm NOT going to be taken away in handcuffs today for attacking an old lady at the post office, so I told her "what the fuck you do that for?" And she told me that she felt like it. What can I do!? I can't hit an old lady. I just turn back around and she calls me a pussy behind my back. After such a stellar day yesterday, I wasn't in the mood. I just ignored her grinding my teeth. Then she started laughing in her smokey he bitch voice. I'm not going to be terroized by an old lady again. And I wasn't going to walk out. So I did something a little mean. When I got my package, I knocked all her mail out of her hand and told her to blow me. As I left everybody was clapping and cheering me on. I think I even saw the kids clapping. I felt I did a great thing today.

My day actually got better. My girlfriend made me dinner and it was really good. She's talking to me now. And I didn't even see stalker chick today. Life is good.....for now.