Monday, January 19, 2009

I Killed Something Today

My hopes and dreams. I took it out back and put it out of its misery.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Don't Be Hatin'

Time for another flashback. I remember "back in the day" I bought this gold tooth. I was so fucking fly! That was until my gums started bleeding. I think I put it on wrong or it might've been too big, but it was cool to be gangsta for half a day.

In other news, I had a dream last night. I dreamt that my sister killed my entire family except me because she felt unappreciated and I had to give her a reason why I should be spared. I couldn't give her an answer and I eventually woke up. Does it have a hidden meaning? Oh well, perhaps I'll have the ending of that dream tonight, or have that dream about the monkey driving a car which always crack me up.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Payback Is a Bitch

Guess who I met Thursday? Zach! I didn't know him but I knew of him, but he knew me. Instead of kicking his ass for sleeping with my girlfriend, we had a very interesting conversation. After the apology for sleeping with my girlfriend, he informed me that she told him that she was pregnant and she said that she doesn't think it's his. I almost shitted my pants thinking back how long ago was it that I had sex with her. Karma is a real bitch. I haven't done anything sexual with her for about 3-4 months ago ever since I had my suspicions she was cheating. We were having a discussion about a girl's period over a couple of beers. He remembers her having one while they were together last month, so that excludes me I think.

He too had his suspicions that she was cheating. He said he noticed a camera setup in her bedroom so he stole one of the tapes to look at it. He said that he saw her sleeping with two other guys on different occasions, and a girl on another occasion. How unfaithful can you be? Just the thought watching a sex tape of people doing your girlfriend over and over again. I wonder if she was that freaky when we were dating. I just felt like burning my bed and all my sheets and just dousing myself in gasoline. And just imagine all the stuff she didn't tape.

Well sometimes life sucks and sometimes life really sucks, and it really sucks to be him. I said he should get tested. I immediately tested myself once I had my suspicions. She was my lesson. I kept my dick in my pants after that experience. You'll need a grenade to clean her venus sex trap. I still wanna see the tape of her and the other girl, but I didn't think it was the right time to ask.

We'll see how this turns out. I think he wants to stay with her just in case the baby is his. Now if I was in his shoes I would've been like peace bitch, I'm out, I'll support the kid but not you.

Saturday, January 03, 2009


I don't get staying in abusive relationships. If somebody hurts you and you're afraid of the person, why stay and be punished? Somebody close to me is in one and she continues to stay and that pisses me off. Their would be no telling what I'd do if I catch him laying a hand on her. I'm so close to leaving right now.

Thursday, January 01, 2009

The Sick Fucking Bastard Is Back!

Oh it feels so fucking good to curse again on this blog. So how can I start the year off Sick Fucking Bastard style.........I got it!

I forgot which sick friend told me this story and I don't remember it all that well. And it's not a question you would bring into a conversation, but I'll tell the story how I remember it. This couple who really enjoyed freaky sex tried something new. So what they did is that they inserted food in her vagina and he would, you know, eat it. Well apparently she got sick and she got infected. She went to the doctor to get it checked out and the doctor found maggots inside her just eating the rotting food. I forgot what happened next but I'm sure they got it cleaned out.

So how was everybody's New Years? I had so many fucking mixed drinks. I need to stop waking up in weird places. Apparently I crashed at this apartment and nobody was there. I checked myself to see if I was missing an organ. I'm still sticking to the fact that I'm not an alcoholic, just a lover of fine wines and liver fuckerupers.