Thursday, January 01, 2009

The Sick Fucking Bastard Is Back!

Oh it feels so fucking good to curse again on this blog. So how can I start the year off Sick Fucking Bastard style.........I got it!

I forgot which sick friend told me this story and I don't remember it all that well. And it's not a question you would bring into a conversation, but I'll tell the story how I remember it. This couple who really enjoyed freaky sex tried something new. So what they did is that they inserted food in her vagina and he would, you know, eat it. Well apparently she got sick and she got infected. She went to the doctor to get it checked out and the doctor found maggots inside her just eating the rotting food. I forgot what happened next but I'm sure they got it cleaned out.

So how was everybody's New Years? I had so many fucking mixed drinks. I need to stop waking up in weird places. Apparently I crashed at this apartment and nobody was there. I checked myself to see if I was missing an organ. I'm still sticking to the fact that I'm not an alcoholic, just a lover of fine wines and liver fuckerupers.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

You're only helping me lose weight with stories like that.

Leni Qinan said...

Good to see you're back and on top form.

About your story: I promise not to try that.

Unknown said...

I just went to throw up man. WTF?

Kate Michele said...

ummm ewwww!!!
i'm just as sick in the head as you cuz as im reading this im all "imagine the smell dude!!"

Euromark said...

perhaps you are missing an organ, and someone else is playing with it to make beautiful music. Greetings to Freud.